I’ve done my degree in design and education.
Can I go be a comedic actor now like I’ve always wanted to?
Having moved out of home and entering my mid-twenties, I’ve done a lot of learning about myself over the past eight months. In that amount of time, both my house mates have coupled up. I haven’t. As a an outwardly confident person - I’m beginning to realise that confident behaviour can overshadow character traits that need work. That no one’s telling me about. Or if they are, I’m not listening.
When it comes to boys:
Whether I like it or not, my brain will tell me one thing (its actually a lot more like a mental word-vomit sort of thing) and my gut will tell me another. This thunderfuck of emotional over thinking leads me to more or less feel shit about myself when it comes to people, sex, relationships and dating.
I’m an over-analyser. I’ve been told this and I completely agree. I also struggle with self confidence. These two things make the dating game pretty tricky.
I’m also quick to label a guy an asshole if the date(s) go well but the relationship is requested for filing on the friend-shelf. I’m not sure how good I am at casual sex or dating a few people at the same time. I think there is an expectation that I should be ok with those things. But I’m not. I am a person who is present and emotionally invested in the moment at hand. I gain energy, confidence and excitement from the banter, the date and the aftermath. Often, the aftermath can become pretty silent, and all the fun I’ve soaked up is suddenly sapped out of me by fear of wondering - why?
At my core, despite being intelligent, motivated, intuitive and a ‘people person’, I think I am emotionally naïve when it comes to relationships. I expect to find that one person, have a great time and let that spiral into a fulfilling relationship. Fuck, I’m a hopeless romantic! But, the whole concept is way too Disney, way too perfect and the expectation is too high for the reality that is at play. Its these high expectations of people, myself and whats going on between myself and the other guy that jeopardises a lot of otherwise pretty great encounters.
Along with being intuitive - that is, understanding the vibes that are coming at you. I’m not sure how good I am at understanding the effects of what I say and do.
I could probably say I’m an over-sharer. But reality is more that I do not internalise my problems - hence why I am typing this. I need to write things down, talk them out, discuss them with friends or talk to myself. That’s my way of dealing with problems. I don’t simply love telling people these things - some of them are actually quite embarrassing. But I’ve learnt that I think outwardly and I talk to cope. Talking and communication, for me, means more of an understanding between one another. But you have to be pretty good at it to make the other person get the same message that you’re sending. Also, you just have to think about whatever the fuck you’re saying before you say it - stupid. I have absolutely no idea how to be better at this and I’m going to keep looking for the answers.
In the grand scheme of things:
Well, if you’ve read this far you can probably tell that I’m writing this because well - something with a boy involving sex, friendship and a pretty full shelf just happened. At the end of the day, shouldn’t I be thinking with a glass half full saying “well at least I made a friend”. I probably should. But the high’s and lows of the past 24 hours aren’t giving that sentiment much momentum in lifting my spirits.
I’m not sure how much time and energy I can give this. And whilst “#foreveralone” is a gimic for some people. I’ve quite seriously felt the fear of this becoming a reality if I don’t start to get some of these things in check.
Does outward problem solving/talking about emotional stuff scare people off?
Do we twenty-somethings get better at dating?
Does emotional detachment in the early stages of seeing people become easier?
Hooray! It’s time once again to visit the Duck Fashion Show, where haute couture meets sassy waterfowl models. For the past 30 years Australian farmer Brian Harrington has been dressing up and showing off his Famous Ducks at the Fashionable Ducks Show, held during Sydney’s annual Royal Easter Show. Harrington works with a professional dressmaker who individually styles each duck in an impressively elaborate costume. The outfits range from day and evening wear, in both modern and period styles, to fancy bridal wear. Each year the beautifully dressed-up ducks
waddleparade along a duck-sized runway before an enthusiastic crowd that numbers in the hundreds.
Visit Brian Harrington’s website to learn more about his fabulous Famous Ducks.
[via Design Taxi]
Why did I not know about this? I am rethinking my ban on the Easter Show.
It’s the end of an era. 6 years with Toying Around, today my keys are returned before it is sold on to the next owner. Here’s to enjoying my Saturday sleep in. But it’s been real. Farewell to the world of retail and the best employers ever. #retail #toyingaround #goodbyes (at Gladesville Shopping Village)